What Makes a Good Leader?

I have been thinking about what makes a good leader. It is never just the tasks we complete or the role we hold. Good leadership shows in how we understand ourselves, how we interact with others, and how we support the people who look to us for guidance.

A good leader starts with self-awareness. Recent research continues to show how important this is. Sepiriti’s work on emotional intelligence explains that leaders who understand their own emotions and responses create healthier, more effective school environments (Sepiriti, 2023). Self-awareness helps us pause before reacting. It helps us speak with intention. It helps us stay aligned with what matters.

Leadership is also emotional work. We shape the emotional tone of a school more than we realize. When we manage our emotions with care, we build trust. When we listen fully, people feel respected. When we communicate clearly, others feel comfortable bringing forward ideas, needs, and concerns. This type of leadership is not about being perfect. It is about being responsible for the impact we have on others.

A good leader also lifts others. Women in leadership bring natural strength to this part of the work. Recent studies show that women often lead through connection, collaboration, and shared purpose. Showunmi found that women leaders use identity, voice, and relational awareness to strengthen the communities they lead (Showunmi, 2021). Speranza and Gilmour explain that women’s leadership often shines through support, authenticity, and creating space for others to grow (Speranza & Gilmour, 2021). When we lift others, we build confidence and belonging. We lead in ways that strengthen the entire school community.

Good leadership grows through practice. Here are a few research-supported strategies that help leaders build self-awareness and intentional action:

1. Use end-of-day reflection
Sepiriti’s work highlights how reflection strengthens emotional intelligence. Notice one moment where you felt aligned with your values and one moment that pulled you away from them. This helps build clarity over time.

2. Practice brief mindful pauses
Even short moments of grounding help leaders speak and respond with more calm and clarity. This supports better communication, especially during tense or emotional conversations.

3. Ask for specific, behavior-focused feedback
A trusted colleague can help you notice patterns you might not see. Ask what you do that supports others and what you do that unintentionally creates tension.

4. Revisit your core values
Speranza and Gilmour highlight how women leaders often act from purpose and identity. Naming your values strengthens your decision-making and anchors your leadership.

5. Intentionally lift one person a day
Showunmi’s work reminds us that connection builds confidence. A brief moment of encouragement, acknowledgment, or support shapes culture more than we think.

When I think about the leaders I admire, they are not the ones who always had the perfect answer. They are the ones who stayed steady in who they were. They cared about people. They understood themselves. They helped others rise.

Good leadership is built through daily practice. It grows each time we choose awareness over reaction and purpose over pressure. It strengthens when we take the time to understand ourselves and the people we lead. When we stay aware, stay intentional, and lift others, we build the kind of leadership that lasts. We build leadership that feels human, connected, and real.

References:

Sepiriti, K. (2023). Considering emotional intelligence as a leadership competency for Lesotho secondary school principals. European Journal of Educational Management, 6(1).

Showunmi, V. (2021). A journey of difference: The voices of women leaders. Frontiers in Education, 6, 548870.

Speranza, A., & Gilmour, J. D. (2021). Ways of seeing women’s leadership in education. Frontiers in Education, 6, 781049.