Redefining Success for Women in School Leadership
For decades, women have been breaking barriers in education leadership, yet the expectations placed on us often feel heavier than the role itself. A “successful” woman principal is too often defined as someone who does it all—leading the school, being constantly available, managing staff and student needs, and still carrying the weight of family responsibilities at home. This version of success is unrealistic, and it comes at a cost.
Women in leadership frequently experience burnout at higher rates because the bar is set impossibly high. We are expected to be both firm and approachable, decisive and nurturing, tireless at work and present at home. These conflicting demands create pressure that quietly pushes women out of leadership roles, reinforcing the very glass ceiling we are trying to shatter.
What if we redefined success for women principals? Success shouldn’t mean sacrificing health, relationships, or personal identity to meet someone else’s standard. Instead, it should mean leading with balance, building systems of support, and sustaining ourselves so we can continue to make an impact.
True leadership for women in education lies not in doing it all, but in modeling what it looks like to set boundaries, care for ourselves, and show that well-being and strength can exist together. By changing how we define success, we open the door for more women to step into leadership and stay there—not just for a few years, but for the long term.
Why Principal Retention Matters Now More Than Ever
Being a principal today is both a privilege and a challenge. On one hand, we have the opportunity to shape a school’s culture, inspire teachers, and support students in meaningful ways. On the other hand, the pressures can feel endless—long hours, high-stakes accountability, staffing shortages, and the constant juggling of responsibilities that often extend far beyond the job description.
When principals burn out or leave, the ripple effect is enormous. Teachers lose stability. Students lose a leader who may have been advocating for them. Families see turnover and begin to question the school’s direction. Research shows that leadership is second only to teaching when it comes to influencing student outcomes. If that’s true, then principal retention isn’t just an HR problem—it’s a student achievement issue.
As someone who has lived this role, I know how quickly the weight of expectations can pile up. Retaining principals requires more than telling us to “take care of ourselves.” It means building systems of support, protecting time for rest and family, and recognizing that school leaders are human beings with limits. If we want to strengthen schools, we need to start by taking care of the leaders who hold them together.
Talking Honestly: Breaking the Silence about Principal Well-Being
In education, we talk a lot about student well-being and teacher well-being. But principal well-being is often left out of the conversation. There’s an unspoken expectation that school leaders should “just handle it,” no matter how overwhelming the demands.
The problem with that silence is that it isolates principals. When leaders feel they can’t admit stress, they internalize it until it becomes unmanageable. I believe we need to normalize conversations about principal well-being in the same way we are starting to normalize them for students and teachers.
Talking about stress and burnout doesn’t make a principal weak. It makes them real. And when leaders model vulnerability and self-care, it gives permission for their staff to do the same. That creates a healthier culture for the whole school.
Shattering the glass ceiling in education leadership isn’t just about advancing careers—it’s also about breaking through the stigma of silence around mental health and well-being. If we want to keep great principals, we need to give them the space to speak up, seek help, and feel supported without judgment.
The Hidden Cost of Principal Burnout
Most people don’t see the toll that school leadership takes on physical and mental health. Principals are expected to be visible, responsive, and strong—yet many of us are quietly exhausted. The hidden cost is that burnout not only drives leaders out of the profession but also impacts our relationships, our decision-making, and even our health.
Think about what burnout looks like: irritability, difficulty sleeping, constant stress, and sometimes even health scares that could have been prevented. These are not just personal struggles; they affect entire school communities. A burned-out leader has less energy to support teachers, less patience for student needs, and less capacity to innovate.
We don’t talk enough about what it feels like to hit that breaking point. The truth is that many principals leave not because they don’t care but because they cared so much, for so long, without enough support, that it wore them down. Recognizing burnout as a systemic problem—not an individual weakness—is the first step. Schools and districts have a responsibility to build healthier conditions for leadership.
Support Systems Principals Can’t Lead Without
When we talk about principal retention, the conversation often circles back to personal resilience. How can leaders manage stress better? How can they balance their time? Those are important questions, but they miss a larger truth: no amount of resilience can make up for the absence of real support systems.
Principals need more than motivational words—they need structural backing. That means districts and boards must ensure workloads are reasonable, responsibilities are clearly defined, and leaders are not constantly filling the gaps left by eliminated positions or shrinking budgets. It means investing in coaching and mentorship, so principals aren’t left to navigate the role in isolation. And it means creating policies that respect boundaries, like protected time for family and personal well-being.
Without these systems, even the most dedicated leaders will eventually burn out. Retention is not about asking principals to give more—it’s about schools and districts giving them what they need to succeed.
Strong support systems don’t just keep principals in their roles. They create healthier schools, more stable staff, and better outcomes for students. If we truly value education, we must start by valuing and supporting the people who lead it.
The Double Burden: Why Women Principals Carry More Than the Job
When women step into school leadership, we bring with us not only our professional responsibilities but also the weight of expectations that extend beyond the role. Many of us are balancing the daily demands of leading a school with the invisible labor of managing households, raising children, or caring for family members. This double burden is real, and it shapes the way we experience leadership.
For women principals, the workday doesn’t always end when the school doors close. The evening may bring homework help, dinner preparation, or the emotional work of caring for others. These responsibilities, layered on top of the long hours already expected in leadership, can quickly lead to exhaustion and feelings of being stretched too thin.
The danger is that this cycle can push talented women out of leadership roles altogether. It’s not because we lack the skills or the passion—it’s because the system isn’t designed to support leaders who carry both professional and personal responsibilities. Without intentional structures of support, the double burden becomes unsustainable.
Acknowledging this reality is the first step. Schools and districts must recognize that the success of women leaders depends on creating flexible, humane conditions that allow us to thrive in all parts of our lives. We should not have to choose between being effective principals and present family members. With the right supports, we can be both.
Breaking the glass ceiling means more than earning the title—it means dismantling the barriers that make it so difficult for women to stay and flourish in leadership.